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    December 24

    新情...

    long time no see...XD
     
    过来拔拔草,最近好的坏的发生着一些事情,貌似很忙,其实很闲,原来是自己并无充实的感觉,近来发现自己一些个功能在逐渐退化着,比如说文字功夫,摄影感觉,PS...
    开始懒散起来,欠下的债越来越多,也不知道哪天可以还毕.
    慢慢开始找不到方向起来,慢慢对现在的工作越发厌恶起来...不知道自己还会这样下去多久,心中不安分的恶魔开始狂燥起来,曾经想丢开所有的一切去寻找自己的梦园,但在一觉醒来过后,仍然上班画图下班睡觉,因为发现这个梦园其实从不存在,即使在梦园里过日子也还是要吃饭也是要穿衣服也是要住房子,天上什么时候下很多腿堡,什么时候下很多可乐,我就搬去梦园,住在可乐搭起的别野里,睡在超辣腿堡拼起的大床上,即使是用纸巾裹起的外套也无所谓,拉上自己喜欢的人儿每天游山玩水,每天看新鲜事物,做自己想做的东西...
    扯远了...其实就是这么一个完全不成型的憧憬,说白了是自己都不知道自己想要什么,我很羡慕那些能说这不是我想要的那些人们,至少他们还知道自己想要什么,而我全然不明,我不想爸爸妈妈再为我操心,我不想爱的人离开我,我不想每天只是为了吃住行计较着那么微薄的工资,我不想每天只是憧憬着loft跟Q5,我更不想每天只是坐在电脑前重复着体力活...
    这么看来,我想要的范围好像有所缩小,但实在无从下脚,心中的那个小恶魔还是一直处于深度睡眠状态,也就这样一直深睡下去,一旦醒来,不知道会不会让爸爸妈妈伤心,不知道会不会让众人嘴巴张到能一下塞进八个腿堡...
    努力啊,木子小希,无论遇到什么困难,相信自己并一直坚持走下去就对了,无论日后自己选择了什么,坚信未来对于我来说没有什么对错可言,尽自己最大努力去做到最好,无论结果如何,尽力了便不会后悔,就如烟花一样,燃烧自己的身体让对方看到最美丽的瞬间,我想这就是自己的价值吧...

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